The Spicey Chicken Cartel

In a pre-emptive move designed to counter Egypt's decision to copyright the Pyramids, members of the Japanese government are considering passing a law to copyright the Sun in honor of Amaterasu, and require everyone who benefits from the Sun, or would like to create a reproduction or derivative work, to pay a licensing fee first.

The reason for this move was simple: "We want to Make $$$$MONEY$$$$$ FAST!!1" said a spokesman.

The Egyptians, however, are not taking this lying down. In a rally designed to drum up support for local efforts to copyright the symbol of their own deity, a group of people were heard shouting "Ra! Ra! Ra!"

Are you interested in making $$$$ fast? Here's an incredibly simple way to do it, and there is nothing to buy, no investment to make, no money to lose! Try it now!

Follow this simple procedure:

1. Hold down the shift key.
2. Hit the 4 key four times

Anytime you find you need more $$$$, you just repeat the procedure!

And, best of all, it is 100% LEAGEL!!!!!1

h/t to "Lucas Barnes", who gave me a good laugh to start my day out with when he sent me a spam with the following subject line:

SUBJECT: World Wide Lootery agent

At least, they can't bust him for false advertising.

(cross-posted at the MMF Hall of Humiliation)

Advanced Fee Fraud (that's "Nigeria 419" for you in Rio Linda) scams have reached "epidemic proportions", according to the BBB in Sioux Falls. And, as with all epidemics, Big Pharma has stepped up to the plate with a proposed new treatment option.

Big Pharma announced the new drug, with a proposed brand name of NoScamz, will need to be administered in a series of 5 injections. To be most effective, the injections must be given in the buttocks, and each injection must be followed by a swift kick to ensure it disperses properly.

A spokesman for Big Pharma told this reporter that it is really, really important to administer NoScamz as early as possible. When contacted by his lobbyists, Gov Rick Perry (R-TX) announced that he would mandate the use of NoScamz by all male children, prior to entering the first grade.

(Cross-posted at the MMF Hall of Humiliation.)

A man convicted of sending the "Dave Rhodes" chain letter today learned that he will have a long time to think about what he did... a long, loooong time, as he was sentenced to spend 78,180 years in prison for his offense - one year for each dollar he claimed to make.

As the judge pronounced sentence, he turned to the convicted criminal and exclaimed

"d00d, you probably never saw more than a handful of all that $$$$MONEY$$$$$ you told everybody you made off this little scam, but have you ever imagined just how long 78,180 years is? To us, it's AWESOME!!!1"

Word is that a special cell will be dug deep in the Antarctic ice pack to preserve the MMFool while he serves his sentence. He will be eligible for parole in 19,545 years.

(Cross-posted over at The MMF Hall of Humiliation.)