THIS is why I believe
Sometimes, when I feel like the whole of existence has gone completely down the crapper, that the best thing to do would be to take a mulligan, hit the hard reset button, and start all over again, I come across something that renews my faith in mankind, and causes me to marvel anew at the ability of God to create something at the same time so broken, yet so perfect, as human beings.
This is one of those "somethings".
The author, Jenny Lawson, is a study in weird. She has a mommy blog on the Houston Chronicle, yet started a personal blog so she could have a place to indulge her passion for dropping f-bombs. She admits to wearing a confidence wig and hiding out in the restroom during conferences, yet she appears on TV wearing a bedsheet and puts out bloggie scribblings like the following jewel:
Fighting intolerance about mental illness, or race, or lifestyle or whatever labeled ?flaw? we are saddled with makes us strong. And today instead of using my strength to say how much I hate every single person that thought that this horrible act of cruelty was in any way acceptable to do to a human being I?m using it to do something so much harder. I?m using it to say that I still love you.
Folks like to ask why I (and others like me) believe as I do, specifically why I continue to practice the Christian faith, when all around me Christians (and what they believe) are coming under fire (sometimes for good reason) for being intolerant and hypocritical. Well, Jenny is probably the best example of why I am a Christian. She is not perfect, not by any stretch of the imagination. In fact, she will be the first to admit (as she often has) that she is "broken". And, she certainly doesn't come across as a stereotypically well-behaved, "chaste" Christian woman. Au contraire, she cusses a lot, she is a self-admitted "sex worker" (she writes for a site that sells sex toys, among other things), and as I already noted she says f*** a lot. And, I don't have a clue as to her church affiliation: I have never asked her this, and to the best of my knowledge she has never talked much about her church-related experiences (except for when she and her husband errr... oh, go to her blog and read it for yourself. It's there, somewhere.)
However, if there is anybody who understands what living their life "after the example of Christ" is about, I have to believe it is Jenny. A woman whose portrait has her in curlers with a hairdryer pointed at her ear, yet whose response is probably the exact opposite of what "the world" expects. A woman who admits that it is harder to love the un-lovable than it is to hate them, but who will do it anyway. Not because it is easy, but because it is right. A woman who understands the true value of diversity, and is willing to coax, rather than to bully and bluster, the rest of us into seeing things from the point of view she has.
And lest you say "no way could God work through one such as her", remember that Moses wasn't exactly the world's greatest orator. Yet, he totally kicked Pharaoh's butt, turning the Nile red and bringing down a rain of frogs and decorated houses with blood and all sort of serious stuff. He also wore bedsheets, if I recall. So, maybe Jenny is just a modern day Moses. Which means, please don't let her near any rivers. Or frogs. Or the outside of my domicile.
So, yeah, I don't know for certain whether I will go to Heaven or not. That is something I take on faith for now, and will find out for sure when I get to the other side, one of these days. In the meantime, I will also endeavor to "change my own behavior" and live my life after the example of Jesus -- and Jenny -- and not because it is the easy thing to do. Because it is the right thing to do.
Wish me luck on this journey.
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