Breathing, sitting quietly banned in public schools as 'religious practice'
The Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals today ruled that making children sit quietly in their seats and breathe was a direct violation of the US Constitution, as these two activities together are a religious practice. From now on, schools must require the children to run around in circles while holding their breath, the judges said.
Reaction to the ruling has been mixed, with teachers reporting that the school day starts out very hectic, but then gets awfully quiet.
The Ninth Circuit also ruled that schools may no longer give tests, as these tend to encourage students to utter prayers and therefore are considered enablers of religion in the schools.
Some lawyer, somewhere, will appeal this ruling. Stay tuned to your local TV station for details.
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